improved

I know I had been a bit of crazy this past months (as you can read from my blog) but now, am back. NOt with my own self but an improved me! ^^ I can't wait to fill this blog with meaningful stuff (as defined by yours truly)...

2nd...

A friend once told me ‘a person is worth shedding a tear if he will not hurt you and make you cry’. I thought about it for a while but my mind shouted aloud ‘I will cry a river for you because my mind and my heart believe we both are worthy and deserving for each other’. Even after every hardship we go through, we still love each other very much. I will not hurt you in any way just to get even. I will show you the love I know. I will not even dare to compare how I love you to anyone else. My love for you is PURE and SIMPLE. Everybody may even be pissed off with me but I will punch everyone out if they dare to break us. I don’t have any intention of letting you go because I LOVE YOU SO MUCH!

As long as I know that you love me for who I am and for what I believe, I will fight everyone who stands in our way. I don’t care what they say as long as I have you, as long as we understand each other. I don’t mind the distance and space as long as we look at the same thing, the FAITH in our LOVE. FAITH is the substance of things hoped for, the evidence of things not seen.

I LOVE YOU...

Choices, Chances and Everything in Between...

Take a good look around you and see that the world has a lot of things to offer. You want them all, though the truth is you can’t have everything. There is a thing in college called ‘The Three S’. Sleep, Study, Social Life. You can accommodate only two out of three. Having a sufficient time for the two S will greatly reduce the remaining S. Keeping three of them is a suicide but IT IS A CHOICE.

Still, we are not sure about the outcome of the choices we make. We just do what’s necessary for it to happen and wish that all the forces around us agree to what we want. Not just because we want it but we put a lot of sacrifices and effort even before we made a choice. Letting go of the other option is as uncomfortable as swallowing a pill without water. But we made a choice because it is what we think we need.

In the end, just remember that we grow in the process. We gain a lot. Achieving the goal is just a bonus. And be prepared for what’s coming next because life is about making choices and taking chances.

Princess's letter

To the one I love and still love,

I wrote this after we broke up. Therapy? Maybe… but here you’ll know what’s inside my heart and my mind.

Day one, the start of our relationship, I thought that I made a good impression on you. It seemed like we can talk for hours! Funny, I felt like highschool again. I felt that this might be ‘it’, though I have to be careful. Your situation is kinda messed up. So the only thing I had in mind was to make you realize what you need.

Days passed and I fell for you, I tried to clear my head but you told me you love me. It’s very rare for a person like me to be loved by someone as a different person, not like a member of the family nor a friend, but the one that you will spend your life with. I accepted it knowing all the consequences. You made sure that you will clean up so everything will be okay. Now, it’s different. My goal is to make you happy for the rest of your life with me.

We talked everyday since it’s the only way we can address the issue of distance. I made sure that my phone will be with me always. We were crazy! Everyday seemed like Christmas to me. We made plans for the future, whether realistic or farfetched. Who cares?! We love each other.

We had been on our wit’s end not to hurt each other. And it’s not hard for me not to look around for the right person because you promised me that you love me. I held on to that very much. I already have the right person for me. I knew I love you no matter what happens. Even if the word ‘libido’ jumps out of our vocabulary, I will still love you. I listened to every word you said, tried to understand everything you do because I love you. Even if you did something wrong, I tried to make you understand what you have done and forgive you, because I really loved you.

You are very special to me.

I only realized it now that I, unknowingly, gave my heart full-reign of my everyday life especially with you. I intended to use my brain and my heart but the love I felt was so powerful that it let my heart have the upper hand. I always imagine you whenever we talk as if I can see you with my heart. I don’t know how but there seemed like there’s a direct line from my heart extending to you. My heart’s like an alarm. If we are happy and content, it’s calm and peaceful. If something’s wrong, it goes haywire. Haha! I know that you’re still spooked by this one but it is true. I can see with my heart. It seemed like my heart’s very sensitive to the people I love.

Everyday, we always do the same things but I never get tired of doing it. It’s like a routine, but a very happy routine. I liked it. I loved every moment of it until something came up.

I never thought that it will be like this. It never entered my mind that I have to let you go. It’s not easy for me. I thought that I did great. But I have to let you go. If I were to choose, I don’t want you to go. I want you to be with me until we are old, so old that we even can’t move nor speak, just look at each other and feel content. But it’s not me who will choose. The decision rests on your hand and you already made one. I just needed you to say it for me to move on. I am so sorry that I have to let your promise go that you will love me no matter what. Hell, it’s painful, I do love you so much, though I have no options.

I hope I made you happy. I wish that I will still be the one that will make you happy as your love for the rest of your life. I hope I did not fail you. I hope that I have done the only thing in my mind from the beginning, that you realized what you need.

Ian

so what! am asian! you have a problem with that?

Yes. i do accept the fact that i love being an asian... and i support asian culture. there is nothing wrong with that.

i have to tell myself that i can't please everybody (as if i haven't told myself this a gazillion times already). you can say bad things about me liking asian pop stars. i will not be ashamed.

What is in store for us...

I know I must not complain about the elections. Am not a registered voter (yep). And if I complain about the government and even the elections, I will surely get nasty looks (or comments) from all of you.

But, I hope that most (I know it's impossible using 'all') of the officials that will be elected will always think about their people. Filipinos put their hopes and trust in them, using their right to vote. The right that gives the officials the power to voice out what is needed and right for the people.

I hope that the voting public elected, not only for the person with much charisma nor the credentials (though they still are significant) but for the person that have the same ideals and principles as they have. The officials will be their voice, the representation of what the Filipinos are.

I hope everything will be all right..

be patient, apple...

I saw this picture on one of my friend's FB page just now... and I remember this way back last year when a friend told me 'bout this at the top of the hand drying machine in their restroom...

This was written by Pete Wentz, bassist for the band Fall Out Boy, telling girls that they have to wait for the right person who aren't afraid and brave enough to 'climb' and sweep them off their feet (I wish am not mistaken here).

I don't know. I have to agree but there's a funny feeling inside me that doesn't feel good about this. Am not saying that this quote is wrong... I don't know (yep, I have to repeat it). I keep on thinking that if I were the apple, I will soon be rotten just like the apples below. Those rotten apples below were once one of the best apples at the top of the tree. No one wants to be one of the rotten apples, right?

Am thinking on how to stop the rotting process. There is one thing that my 'naive' mind is telling me. HOPE AND BE PATIENT! Hope and patience that the right person will come before you rot. Better, have the hope that there you will not rot, ever!

But in my case, am near being rotten beyond recognition... ^^ hope you'll not rot like me..

P.S.

As I was doing this. Am amazed that Pete Wentz also wrote books and the better half of Ashley Simpson (I like her!).